Eastbourne, East Sussex · Entirely Questionable

The Seagull Times

Satire 'News' Stories - Eastbourne, East Sussex

The Seagull Times

Our Newsroom

Last updated 27 August 2026

Our Newsroom

Every member of The Seagull Times newsroom has a specialist area of expertise, although nobody has yet been able to explain why this was necessary.

Robin Sheffield leads the publication and oversees editorial decisions, while Barry Beakman keeps a close eye on Eastbourne's local stories, Derek Pebbles ventures further across Sussex, and Sally Squawks handles the increasingly difficult task of monitoring the area's seagull population.

Meet The Team

The Seagull Times is powered by a small team of highly dedicated, questionably qualified correspondents covering the stories that matter across Eastbourne and Sussex.

From council chaos and local oddities to Sussex rivalries and organised gull activity, our newsroom remains committed to bringing you the very best in completely unnecessary journalism.


Robin Sheffield

Editor

Oversees The Seagull Times newsroom, editorial direction and the stories that matter across Eastbourne and Sussex — along with several that probably do not.


Barry Beakman

Senior Local Correspondent

Covers the everyday dramas, minor inconveniences and completely unnecessary controversies of life in Eastbourne, from seafront incidents to neighbourhood outrage.


Derek Pebbles

Sussex Correspondent

Reports on important issues, minor disputes and unnecessary rivalries across Sussex, including whatever Brighton, Lewes, Hastings and the rest of the county are arguing about this week.


Sally Squawks

Seagull Affairs Correspondent

Investigates chip thefts, bakery surveillance and increasingly organised gull activity across Eastbourne, often at considerable personal risk to her lunch.


Jeanette Deckchair

Community & Lifestyle Correspondent

Jeanette Deckchair covers the people, peculiarities and everyday dramas that make Eastbourne what it is. She can usually be found somewhere along the seafront, allegedly working.


Anonymous Seagull

Confidential Gull Correspondent

Little is known about Anonymous Seagull, and that's probably for the best. Operating from undisclosed rooftops across Eastbourne, our confidential correspondent provides rare access to the town's increasingly organised gull community.

Contact The Newsroom

Got a story idea, spotted something ridiculous happening locally, or have information relating to suspicious seagull activity?

Newsroom & Story Tips
newsroom@theseagulltimes.co.uk

Editorial Enquiries
editor@theseagulltimes.co.uk