Eastbourne Woman Leaves Home Without Coat After Seeing Sunshine, Regrets Decision Within Seven Minutes

By Jeanette Deckchair, Community & Lifestyle Correspondent

EASTBOURNE — An Eastbourne woman has admitted making a serious error of judgement after leaving home without a coat because it looked sunny outside.

Local resident Margaret Collins made the decision shortly after 10am when she opened her curtains and observed blue sky, sunshine and what appeared to be pleasant weather.

She left the house wearing only a light top.

Seven minutes later, she regretted everything.

"I should've known better," Margaret said.

"I've lived here for years."

Conditions Initially Promising

Margaret says there were no obvious warning signs.

The sun was shining.

Trees appeared relatively calm.

Someone walked past wearing shorts.

"I thought, lovely."

She briefly considered taking a jacket anyway.

Then she made the catastrophic decision to trust Eastbourne.

"I actually said to myself, 'I won't need it.'"

Experts believe this was the precise moment events became unavoidable.

Wind Arrives From Nowhere

Approximately four minutes into her journey, Margaret noticed conditions beginning to change.

A light breeze appeared.

This quickly became what she described as "that bloody seafront wind."

Her hair changed direction.

A nearby bin made a noise.

Somebody's receipt travelled towards Pevensey.

Margaret continued walking.

"I thought I'd be alright once I got into town."

She was not.

Sunshine Remains Completely Useless

Most frustratingly, the sun remained visible throughout the ordeal.

"It looked warm."

"It wasn't warm."

Margaret repeatedly moved between sunlight and shade in an attempt to establish what season it was.

Results were inconclusive.

In direct sunshine, conditions felt almost pleasant.

Three metres later, she entered shade and immediately required emergency knitwear.

"This isn't weather."

"It's a trap."

Other Residents Better Prepared

Margaret soon began noticing that experienced Eastbourne residents had made different choices.

One man was wearing a coat.

Another carried an umbrella despite there being almost no cloud.

A woman had sunglasses, a cardigan and waterproof jacket simultaneously available.

Margaret realised these people understood.

"You can't dress for the weather here."

"You dress for all possible weather."

Emergency Cardigan Considered

By the time she reached the town centre, Margaret was seriously considering buying another layer.

She entered a shop.

Picked up a cardigan.

Looked at the price.

Decided she wasn't that cold.

She walked back outside.

A gust of wind immediately hit her.

Margaret returned to the shop.

The cardigan was purchased.

Weather Improves Immediately

Approximately three minutes after buying it, the wind disappeared.

Temperatures rose.

The sun became noticeably warmer.

Margaret was now too hot.

She removed the cardigan.

"This town is taking the piss."

Meteorologists have declined to comment.

Lesson Learned

Margaret says she will never again leave home without some form of outerwear, regardless of what conditions appear to be doing.

Her new preparation checklist includes:

Coat.

Sunglasses.

Umbrella.

Cardigan.

And:

Complete distrust of the sky.

At the time of publication, Margaret had safely returned home.

She looked through the window.

The weather appeared beautiful.

Her husband suggested they go for a walk.

Margaret picked up her coat.

"Nice try."