Eastbourne Man Accidentally Drives Into Town Centre, Still Looking For Way Out
Local authorities say the 54-year-old remains "somewhere near Terminus Road".
The Archive
Latest Stories
The latest satire, parody and local nonsense from Eastbourne and across East Sussex.
21 published stories
Eastbourne Seagull Spends Entire Afternoon Following Family Holding Greggs Bag
Bird reportedly unwilling to rule out "future opportunities".
Sussex Villages Locked In Fierce Competition To Host Slowest Summer Fête
Judging delayed after organiser couldn't find the raffle tickets.
Hastings Man Refuses To Admit Eastbourne Beach Is Cleaner
Insists "it's just different dirt."
Seafront Cafe Forced To Ask Customers To Stop Feeding Chips To Seagulls "For A Laugh"
Birds now refusing anything below restaurant quality.
Eastbourne Pier Introduces VIP Queue For Pensioners With Folding Chairs
New lane promises "minimal standing and maximum tutting."
Lewes Man Claims Eastbourne Is "Basically Brighton"
Police confirm there is no legal action they can take against "objectively incorrect opinions".
Featured
Tourists Spend Four Hours Looking For Belle Tout Lighthouse From Wrong Cliff
Family eventually admits they may have "taken a wrong turn" somewhere near Beachy Head.
Eastbourne Council Announces £4.2 Million Consultation Into Whether Another Consultation Is Needed
Residents urged to "have their say" by completing a 186-page survey on the future of public surveys.